What makes a great parent?
A good parent is a person who strives to make decisions in the most effective interest of the child.
What can make a great parent is not only identified by the parent 's actions, but also the intention of theirs.
A good parent does not have to be ideal. No one is perfect. No kid is perfect either … keeping this in mind is essential when we set our expectations.
Profitable parenting is not about achieving perfection. Though it doesn't imply that we should not work towards that goal. Set very high standards for ourselves first and then our children next. We serve as role models that are important for them.
Top Ten Parenting Tips
You'll be a better parent, if you stick to these 10 tips for parenting tips, and you will steer clear of bad parenting.
Not all of them tend to be that simple.
It is unlikely that anybody is able to do them all the time.
However, even if you only do a part of these suggestions in this parenting guidebook, you'll be moving in the correct direction in case you continue working on them.
#1 BE A good Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Don't just tell your child what you want them to do.
The best way to teach is to show them.
Human is a special species in part because we are able to learn by imitation. We're programmed to imitate others' actions, comprehend them, and integrate them in to our own. Children, in particular, watch everything their parents do very carefully.
So, be the individual you would like the child of yours to be - respect your kid, show them positive attitude and behavior, have empathy towards your kid's emotion - as well as your kid will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show them Through ACTION
Show your love.
There's simply no such thing as loving your child too much. Loving them can't spoil them.
Just what you choose to do (or give) in the name of love may - things as material indulgence, low expectation, leniency, and over-protection. When these things are provided in place of love that is real, that is when you'll have a spoiled kid.
To love your child can be as easy as offering them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and listening to your kid's problems seriously.
Showing these actions of love can cause the release of feel good hormones such as oxytocin. These neurochemicals are able to provide us a deep sense of calm, emotional warmth, and contentment; from these, the kid, will develop resilience and also not to mention a closer connection with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Babies are born with around 100 billion brain cells (neurons) with relatively few connections. These connections create the thoughts of ours, drive the actions of ours, shape the personalities of ours, and basically determine who we are. They're "sculpted", strengthened, and created through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, especially in the early years. They will then be equipped to experience positive experiences themselves and provide them to others.
But if you give your child bad experiences, they will not have the kind of development needed for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Have a tickle marathon. Go on the park. Laugh with the child of yours. Give them good attention. Ride with an emotional tantrum with them. Solve a problem together with an optimistic attitude.
These positive experiences create excellent neural connections in your child's brain and create the memories of you your child carries for life.
With regards to discipline, it appears to be hard to remain positive, particularly when dealing with behavior problems. But it is possible by utilizing positive discipline and avoiding harsh discipline.
Being a great parent means you need to teach your child the morals of what's right and what's wrong.
Setting limits and being consistent will be the golden rule to good discipline. Be firm and kind whenever you set rules and implement them. Concentrate on the reason behind the child's misbehavior. And allow it to be a chance for them to learn for the future in a good way, instead of to get penalized for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR YOUR CHILD
Tey letting your child realize that you will always be there for them by being responsive to your child's signals and vulnerable to the needs of theirs. Support and accept your child as a person. Be a warm and safe place for your child to explore from and go back to.
Kids raised by parents who are consistently responsive tend to have much better psychological regulation development, interpersonal skills development, and mental health outcomes.
#5: Talk with The CHILD of yours And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Many of us already know the importance of communication. Talk to your child and also listen to them thoroughly. By maintaining an open line of communication, you will have a much better relationship with your child and your child will come to you when there's an issue.
But there is an additional reason behind communication. You help your kid integrate various parts of their brain, a crucial process in a kid's development.
Integration is akin to the body of ours, in which various organs must coordinate and work in concert to have a trully healthy body. When various regions of the brain are incorporated, they are able to function harmoniously as a whole, which means fewer tantrums, more good behavior, more empathy, and better mental well-being.
To do that, conversation through troubling experiences. Ask the child of yours to explain what happened and the way they felt to develop attuned communication.
You don't have to provide solutions. You do not have to have all of the answers to become an excellent parent. Just listening to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using simple words will help them make sense of their experiences and integrate their memories.
#6: Reflect on Your own personal CHILDHOOD
A lot of us wish to parent differently from the parents of ours. Even people who had a good upbringing and a happy childhood may wish to alter some aspects of the way they had been brought up.
But very frequently, when we open the mouths of ours, we speak just like our own parents did.
Reflecting on the own childhood of ours is an action towards understanding why we parent the way we do. Make note of things you would like changing and think of how you'd get it done differently in a genuine scenario. Try to be aware and change your behavior the next time those issues come up.
Do not quit in case you don't succeed at first. It will take practice, a lot of practice to consciously change one 's child-rearing strategies.
#7: Focus on Your own WELL-BEING
Parents require relief also.
Pay attention to your own well being to avoid parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things such as your own needs or the overall health of your marriage are placed on the back burner when a child is born. If you do not take note of them, they will become bigger issues down the road. Take time to enhance your relationship with your spouse.
Stressed-out parents tend to be more prone to fighting. Do not be afraid to request parenting help. To have some "me time" for self-care and stress management is crucial to rejuvenate the brain.
How parents take care of the child of theirs physically and mentally can make a big difference in the parenting of theirs and family life. If these two areas fail, the child of yours will suffer, also.
#8: Do not SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
No doubt, to some parents, spanking is able to result in short-term compliance which occasionally is a much-needed help for the parents.
Nevertheless, this method doesn't teach the kid right from wrong. It only teaches the child to fear outside consequences. The child is then motivated to stay away from getting caught with inappropriate behavior.
Spanking the child of yours is modeling to the child that he/she is able to resolve issues by violence. A child who's spanked, smacked, or hit is much more vulnerable to fighting with other children. They are much more likely to become bullies and also to use verbal/physical aggression to resolve disputes.
Later in daily life, they're also more apt to lead to delinquency and oppositional behavior, even worse parent child relationships, mental health problems, and domestic violence victims or even abusers.
You will find a variety of more effective options to discipline that have been proven to be more effective, like good discipline (Tip #3 above ) and positive reinforcement.
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What is your goal in increasing a kid?
When you are like the majority of parents, you want your child to do well in school, be prosperous, be independent and responsible, be respectful, enjoy good relationships with you and others, be caring and compassionate, and have a happy, healthy and fulfilling life.
But how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
If you're like the majority of parents, you most likely spend the majority of the time simply attempting getting through the day. As authors, Bryson and Siegel, point out in the book of theirs, The Whole Brain kid, rather than helping your kid thrive, spent most of time simply attempting to survive!
To not allow the survival mode dominate the life of yours, the next time you feel angry or frustrated, step back. Think about what anger and frustration will do for you or your child.
Instead, find ways to switch each bad experience right into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums could be turned into https://parentinghowto.com/ invaluable brain-sculpting moments if you focus on teaching the child of yours, not attempting to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT Through the use of Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I do not mean shortchanging your child with tricks. What I mean is taking advantage of what's currently known by scientists.
Parenting is one of the most researched fields in psychology. Many parenting strategies, practices, or traditions were scientifically researched, refined, verified, or refuted.
For best parenting advice for raising a child and information which are supported by science, here is one of my personal favorite science based parenting books, The Science of Parenting.
Using medical knowledge is of course not really a one-size-fits-all strategy. Every child is different. Quite possibly within the very best parenting style, there are able to be many different effective parenting methods you can choose according to your child's temperament.
A very good example is employing spanking to discipline. There are numerous better alternatives, time-in, reasoning, e.g. redirection, etc. You can choose a non punitive discipline method that actually works best for the child of yours.
Naturally, you can additionally choose to utilize "traditional" or maybe "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or spanking) and also may nonetheless get a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has shown us that kids with different temperaments respond to the quality of parenting differently.
Those who are more vulnerable to parenting quality will have much better outcomes under good parenting but even worse outcomes under bad parenting.
Those who are much less susceptible may "turn out fine" regardless of how tough their parents treat them. Though it doesn't imply those practices are good. These children are merely lucky. They can thrive despite poor parenting, not because of it.
Why take a possibility with sub-par parenting practices if you can use well-researched, better ones?
The value of parenting cannot be underestimated. Taking science-based parental advice might not be the easiest way to parent. It might require more work on the part of yours in the short term but can save you lots of agony and time in the long run.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The great point is, that although parenting is hard, it's also very rewarding. The bad part will be the rewards typically come much later than the hard work. But in case we try our best now, we'll ultimately reap the rewards and have absolutely nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!